Hey guys! Remember me? I like to talk about indie polish and fight bears*? Anyways, I haven’t been around in a while. I’ve been off, doing non-polish related things. But I missed you all during my mini hiatus, and I missed making you listen to me blather on about indies, and I know you missed me too so WORRY NO MORE! I’m back with a big post featuring Scofflaw Nail Varnish. You may all heave a collective sigh of relief.
Up first I’ve got ‘Love Letter To Bea Arthur.’ I feel like this polish doesn’t get the love it deserves. It always seems to sell slower than other Scofflaws, and I don’t see it featured very often on blogs. Which is crazypants, because it’s awesome. It’s a spectacular ‘neutral’ or ‘nude’ that I could see being flattering on a lot of skin tones.
Do you know how hard it is to find a neutral that doesn’t fall into grandmother or boring territory? It’s difficult. Most of the times when I try a ‘neutral’ polish, my nails end up looking like they’ve closed their eyes and are napping. But ‘Love Letter To Bea Arthur’ is classy. My nails have shrugged on a dusty rose silk gown with layers of gold and plum peeking through; they’re sashaying all over town like a madam. This polish will make you feel fancy, but subtle-fancy. Try wearing it while smoking a long-stemmed cigarette and sighing, “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.”
(Also, I feel like I need to admit that I have absolutely no idea who Bea Arthur is. But I’m not googling it, because I like the imaginary classy lady I have made up in my head to go with this polish.)
Next up: David Bowie’s Bulge. Rawr.
For some reason, my camera refused to accurately capture this polish, but I didn’t realize until much later when I had uploaded the photos to my laptop. I imagine my camera snickering in the corner like, “Oh, you wanted pictures of this awesome dusty coral-red-orange polish? HAHA! Sorry, can’t do that for you. Hate you mucho! Muah!” Stupid camera.
That aside, this has become one of my absolute favorite polishes in my collection, and that’s not just because I am an insane David Bowie fan.
It’s a gorgeous polish – the hue is strikingly unique, a sort of faded, burned-out red. Yet, even while appearing ‘faded,’ it still pops with an eye-catching intensity on the fingers. I got several compliments when wearing this polish. And I’m talking compliments from other people, not just myself when I would wash my hands in front of a mirror and notice my nails and exclaim, “DAYUM GIRL! Your nails look GOOD!”
I wish I could have more accurately captured this elusive shade on camera, but seriously: one of my top ten favorites now.
Okay, I have one more Scofflaw to talk about, but I didn’t realize how excited I would be about blogging to you all again and I have talked way more than I meant to, so I’ll try to keep this last review short. This is Flotsam & Jetsam:
Sea green with turquoise and purple shards mixed in, making it sweet with a bite. The base color is delicate, but the shards give it an edge, and it’s all perfectly balanced. For some reason, it reminds of the eighties. I could imagine Jem of ‘Jem & The Holograms’ wearing this while working her undercover day job.
Jem is my NAME!
SO. Anybody still here? If you are, let me close by saying this: you’re awesome, Scofflaw Nail Varnish is fantastic, and if you want to get Scofflaw on your totally tubular nails, you can find it at her etsy shop or Llarowe.
*Just kidding about the fighting bears part. I actually really like bears and don’t like fighting anything except for my husband when he tries telling me that pizza is not the best food in the world. Now look at this gif of an adorable bear with a mushroom.
DON’T FIGHT BEARS. They just want to eat mushrooms.